I take back what I said yesterday, for I had a nervous breakdown today. I literally started crying after my last class, tearing up as I walked home.
I attribute it to the fact that I came home from work at 12:30 last night and had to wake up at 8 a.m. this morning. Also to the fact that I just found out I have an 8-page paper due on Reading Day. Reading Day, seriously, what the fuck? And also maybe because I’m on my period.
My roommate is currently hogging the TV right now to watch that Glee show. Again I ask, how can a dumb show like that take precedence over Game 5 of a very important playoff series? I like to think I’m a person who keeps a very open mind, but one thing I will never ever understand is why people don’t like NBA basketball. Or the Chicago Bulls. It’s silly, I know, but that is just the one part of me that will never shake. I’ve always said I can’t marry a guy who does not like the NBA, or basketball at the very least. I really, truly can’t…unless you’re from another country where another sport takes precedent (which is what happened to me a lot in Costa Rica, LOLz). Anywho, my roommate made a comment on how the one playoff game she really cared about doesn’t start until later…arghh! I need to find girl friends who like basketball. Forreals.
Last night, I made a total fool of myself. I’m not going to go into details, but the events after 2am were embarrassing enough. And so, for now, I’m going to stop with a certain habit. I’m not a dedicated smoker (of anything) by any means, as I’ve only ever done it occasionally, but today when I woke up I imagined some pretty gross things. So absolutely no more of that for awhile. I’ve got more important things to do with my time.
As a result of last night’s dumb ending, I didn’t go to bed until 5am. I’ve been operating this entire day on practically no sleep, as well as a really really bad hangover. Which means, my grand plans of doing homework and studying all day today had sadly gone to waste. I was so productive Saturday, I wrote up half my take-home midterm for history and I even started writing for Demand Studios again, since I’m strapped for cash. Today I did manage to read for class, and start on some assignments.
I wish I could find things to blog about besides my never-ending pile of schoolwork and other kinds of work. I will say this, before today’s dinner with the roommates at Red Lobster, I still had yet to spend a single $ on outside food. And actually, last night I didn’t spend anything at all on alcohol at the bars. And, and! I’ve started cutting up coupons and saving them, and in my first coupon-filled trip to County Market, I spent about $8 on bread, macaroni and cheese, salad dressing, Totino’s pizzas, and other minor items. $8! I couldn’t believe it.
Getting quite proud of myself. Last night I was THISCLOSE to getting Chipotle. My self-restraint is finally coming through for me!
Let’s see…I got out of my history class early today. Came home around 3:30. Immediately checked on White Sox season opener; at the time, Sox were up 14-0. Also ate some leftover pinto I made last night.
So really, I gave myself about a half hour to wind down from the day. Meant to jump back into studying around 4:30…but for a good 2.5 hours, I either laid in bed daydreaming or avoiding my homework. I managed to start studying for my sociology exam Monday at around 7:20…and am now taking a break from it.
Rather upset with myself now. I was doing SO good this week. Not only did I manage to survive my first week of schedule hell (as previously mentioned, I am now burdened with a 19-hour courseload, work, and a new internship), I got all my homework in on time. And it was all quality work, too. Then yesterday I hit a bit of a snafu. I passed out immediately when I got home from my last class at 4, and didn’t wake up until 8:30ish. Figured I’d relax for an hour before hitting the books again.
Then, lo and behold, my friends started blowing up my phone around 10, 10:30. I ended up going out with them to a couple bars. One thing here I should mention: when I thought I wasn’t going out, I took an Advil around 10pm to relieve a headache I’d been having all day. I inconveniently forgot all about this, naturally, as an hour later I began taking shots, double fisting, and accepting free drinks from others. Needless to say, I was very very close to vomiting my brains out. My body is still reeling from the effects of last night, lol.
And now it’s almost 8pm on this Friday night. Whilst I had no plans of going out (was hoping to go to a gymnastics meet with my roommate since I can’t go tomorrow, but oh well), I am feeling rather lonely. It’s 8pm and neither of my roommates are home yet. I don’t quite like this, I don’t like feeling alone!! And what is it they can be doing without me?!
I’ve been trying to figure out a way to write something without spewing out a handful of whines, complaints and the like. Because I don’t want it to seem like that’s all I do. Nevertheless, if you can’t rant on your blogs then where can you rant, right?
I received the results of my take-home exam last week in my EPS class, which I’m not too happy about. Or rather, I’m not sure how to read the results, because it goes off a 15-point scale rather than the usual % grade, which I’m a much bigger fan of. I was marked down points for not elaborating enough, which in all honesty I find a tad ridiculous considering I basically repeated the information from the handout word-for-word and therefore could not have left out any important details.
Lately I’ve been getting angrier at this American lifestyle I’ve been socialized to live. Americans seem to thrive off stress; people always need to be on the go. You go to college and take classes and do extracurricular activities and basically are expected to not sleep at all. No time for rest. At the moment I’m not feeling it too much; rather, sometimes I feel guilty that my life isn’t fast-paced enough, and that’s the part that angers me, especially now that I have to start looking for jobs and whatnot. Why should I have to make my life stressful? I know hard work leads to success, but I miss the relaxed atmosphere in Costa Rica. Less worries, less panic over things not getting done. You do what you do and let life be. I miss being able to sleeeeeeeep.
This is not what I originally meant this post to be. See what school and this dumb life does to me? I can’t even blog properly anymore.
Warning: Possible TMI 😉 So yesterday I thought my period came. I woke up to find bleeding. Normally I do get my period on Mondays…but the thing is, I’m still in the ‘white pill’ part of my birth control cycle and technically I should not be getting my period until next week! The other thing is, I get this heavyish flow that only lasts from morning til afternoon. It happened yesterday and it’s happening today too, where there’s no blood at night. And another, third thing is, the blood is not normal-colored. Like it looks, at times, more orangeish than red. WTF is wrong with my body?!
As if that wasn’t bad enough, I’ve been waking up every morning with a buttload of phlegm in my throat and terrible congestion up my nose. Way to make me feel even more shitty, body.
This week was my first ‘hell week’ in a really long time (not since last May!). I had an exam yesterday morning and two major papers due today. I didn’t start studying/working hardcore til last Friday, but I’m thinking I totally rocked the exam yesterday. And I managed to pump out my 5-page English paper on Margaret Atwood’s The Edible Woman in 2.5 hours. Guess I still got that good college student thing in me.
Hmm, you know I’m sure had plenty of things to blog about besides my body weirdness, school and boys. But that’s all I can think of at the moment!