What a year

Merry Christmas everybody. We’ve come to the end of 2015.

No idea how I made it. Really don’t. I’m sitting here in my old bedroom at my parents’ house and I’m wondering how on earth I survived all the shenanigans, all the heartaches, all the stress, all the madness. All the changes. Another year gone by. Time continues to pass, and I continue to wonder at what the heck I am doing with my life.

Keep calm and carry on, as they say.

I have become Bridget Jones

It has been two months and 11 days since I moved into this cute little studio apartment in Chicago’s Northwest Side all by myself. Yes, folks, I’m like a legit grown-up now. Crazy to think that a few months ago I was cramped in my little bedroom at my parents’ house, and now I have all this space to myself, it’s ridiculous. This morning I woke up at 7:15, rolled out of bed at 8, took out the garbage, made myself a huge breakfast omelette, drank some coffee courtesy of the Keurig my dad kindly passed down to me, and now I’m sitting here in the living room listening to the Ella Fitzgerald Pandora station and wondering what on earth to do with myself.

Because, alas, I’m also finding myself encountering all these emotions and scenarios that up until now had only existed in the books and movies for me. Like yesterday, when it was a certain person’s birthday and after coming to the conclusion that he did not want to see me on his birthday, I made myself a taco and chugged through three glasses of wine before passing out on my bed at 9:30 in the evening because the thought of spending a Friday night awake and alone while everyone in the world was out having fun was just too much to bear. Then, when I checked my phone this morning, I had 10+ messages from the certain person insisting that his phone was not working and asking me what I was doing. This was all after I had gone to sleep, of course, so as a result I woke up to Snapchats from him out and having fun with our friends. Now I’m just sitting here wallowing in my sad pathetic misery.

OK. Enough wallowing. Must shower and get on with life.

The Fall

So admittedly, I almost forgot I had a blog here (again). It’s been nearly 3 months, and much has definitely happened since my last entry, including:

  • Going to New Orleans in October for work
  • Getting kissed by a random Kiwi on Halloween in what was my first post-relationship pucker
  • Watching the season 8 finale of Doctor Who at a geek bar…actually, it literally was called Geek Bar and it was awesome
  • Going to Fright Fest at Six Flags and having about six simultaneous heart attacks when a fella with a chainsaw found out I was frightened of him
  • Friendsgivings galore
  • Doing a variety of non-alcohol-related things, such as Trapped in a Room with a Zombie, visiting a pumpkin farm, seeing I Love Lucy Live on Stage, and taking advantage of the free days at the Field Museum
  • Getting promoted at work (that one was a biggie)

There are more, I’m sure, but seeing as it is currently the Saturday before Christmas, I need to get some shit together and start Christmas shopping. Feliz Navidad!

Travel over everything

I just spent most of my evening going over all the airline mileage rewards accounts I’ve accumulated over the years: U.S. Airways’ Dividend Miles, Delta’s SkyMiles, the AAdvantage program, and now MileagePlus from United. I don’t know how people keep track of these things all the time. And I don’t know why, after many years of traveling, I’m only now paying attention to this stuff. The amount of miles I actually have in my balances pale in comparison to all the real-life miles I’ve flown: from here to the Philippines, here to London, here (meaning Chicago) to Spain. The list goes on. I guess better late than never, right?

Anyway, the end result of my labors tonight ended up with me booking a flight to Miami in January. While not entirely spontaneous, it was still a pretty random decision to make on a Monday evening. You see, one of my girl friends and I had been trying to plan a trip to Costa Rica in November for weeks and it eventually fell through. Another one of my girl friends had mentioned Miami for January a while back as well, so I suggested that as a fallback trip to my other friend. Anyway, nothing’s even confirmed with all these friends but I just couldn’t take it anymore. Is it smart? My mother would probably say no. But I feel I’ve come to a point in my life where I do not care. I just want to travel and explore and get lost.

Yes, that’s where I’m at in life right now. As Aubrey Graham would say, YOLO!

It is a truth universally acknowledged

…that I only write in this blog when I feel my life is going absurdly shitty in one way or another. September has been an odd month. I have, at times, felt any or all of the following: depressed, bored, excited, sad, bitchy, annoyed, angry, content, and meh. It didn’t help that my period came three weeks late; when you’re off the pill and you’re not having sex, not knowing where your period is should not mean a thing, but I was just plain angry with my reproductive system for holding itself up. I mean, hello, I’d like to get it over with. (Is that TMI?)

What has happened since I last wrote? Well, as I imagined, once the fun craziness that was summer had died down, my quarter-life crisis came back in full swing. I won’t go into the sordid details (yet) but several things happened this month that turned my life on its head and caused me to be a recluse. For one thing, my younger brother left to study abroad in Japan, which is yes very exciting for him but also made me feel rather blue because it reminded me of my study abroad days. Not to mention, I didn’t realize how boring home life could be without my brother! I hope he doesn’t read this and doesn’t ever find out I’ve expressed that sentiment, but I looked at him as sort of a sidekick. And now I’m bored. My youngest brother is still around, but he’s such a teenager I never know what kind of mood swing I’m going to get.

Another thing that happened was I got Netflix. Yes, that’s right. Not for the first time technically, but this is the first time I’ve actually been using it and watching things. I’d been resisting for so many years, but my obsession with Doctor Who has greatly intensified that I wanted to watch older episodes (meaning the seasons with Chris E and David Tennant, as well as some of the earlier Matt Smith episodes). And I knew the show was on there, so when my brother offered to set up another free trial that he got in his email (he uses Netflix on and off, when random online parties send him free trials) I decided to roll with it. Luckily I haven’t found myself in a cesspool of binge watching like so many others; just Doctor Who and Grey’s Anatomy. I don’t know if I have the stomach to lose myself into another show.

By the way, speaking of the Doctor, did I mention I met Mr. Smith himself last month?!

That may have been the greatest birthday present I’ve ever gifted myself. And I’m never ever washing that blue dress.